Because of my PDDNOS, ADHD and kinds of autism, I have been in a lot of day-care. Because my parents did not know how to deal with me. From the age of six I went to a kind of out-of-school care for 2.5 years, to practice with the upbringing. When I was 9, I was sent to a 24 hour reception. I had strict companions and felt abandoned. I was almost 11 when I left there.
Then I went back to live with my parents. My parents got a divorce the same year. My parents lived together for another year during the divorce. I saw my mother sleep on an air mattress for a year and they had a lot of argument. This was a very difficult period for me with lots of stimuli.
A year after my parents were officially divorced, my mother got a new boyfriend. At first sight he looked like a good man, but after a few months he turned out to have an alcohol problem. During the day he was happy but as soon as he got alcohol he became very extreme. He became aggressive and locked me up in my room all day. This cannot be done for someone with PDDNOS, ADHD and forms of autism. at some point it escalated and he was arrested by the police.
My mother was admitted to an entered an undisclosed facility , because she wanted to end her life. I lived with my father for three months. He also had a new wife. After 3 months my mother was allowed to go home again, but she could not take care of us. My father did not want us to live with him also . He wanted to live with wife and said we did not fit into this story.
They decided that it would be better if my brother and I went to a foster family. We were so young so than we did not understood this choice. We felt set aside. My foster parents also had to get used to us . They were very strict. After 2 to 3 years I started to understand my foster parents. In the beginning I was afraid to talk to them because they were so steady.
I felt trapped and walked away from home. At that moment I realized how much I meant for them and how much effort they had done. I now am aware of the fact that it is difficult to deal with PDDNOS, ADHD and forms of autism. We had a good conversation and after that everything went much better. They have done me a lot of good, we went on vacations, I had pocket money and I felt appreciated. I am very grateful to them that they have never given up on me.
At school i felt misunderstood as well. I have trouble with busy places and sometimes my classmates noticed that I got crazy expressions. they often thought that I was not quite right and you noticed that too. in breaks i was often alone and was excluded. Until I had to make a presentation. I explained that I have PDDNOS, ADHD and forms of autism since then people started to understand me better. I got a nice bond with my classmates and felt very comfortable.
When I turned 18 I had to leave my foster parents and I went on sheltered accommodation. I it is super fun, first it was difficult and I was lonely. Now I have a lot of contact with my roommates, who also have their own problems. We talk a lot and this really helps me.
I work at the Kwaliatria (snackbar) , first I had to get used to the crowds, but I feel comfortable now. From the beginning i was fully accepted. that is a very nice feeling. I have good contact with my foster parents and parents and had mandatory call moments with my parents. I never liked this with my father, but now I understand him better. I’m trying to let it go. I feel good now and try to focus myself and the future.